The time will come one sunny afternoon when you are sitting in your garden, or on the patio of your favorite restaurant with a glass of your favorite beverage, and the thought will hit you-I’m an adult now! Being an adult doesn’t really have a specific age, you could be 21 and think like a 30-year-old, or you could be 40 and still feel like a teenager. Whether you’re Generation X, Y, Millenial or even a Boomer, two key factors that indicate early on whether or not you are truly an adult is by the way you act and the things you value.

Being and living as a successful adult or “adulting” as some call it, comes with a variety of expectations. There are those who believe that they are adulting simply by having a job, paying bills, and spending time with family and friends. But in reality, being a successful adult is about enjoying and balancing the critical things in our lives and doing so responsibly with ethics and values.

So, allow me to pose this question, are you a successful adult? How do you rate yourself in the following 12 areas?

1. You accept feedback.

One of the things that set adults apart from teenagers is the ability to accept constructive criticism without taking offense to it. As you mature, your perception of life will evolve and change. Those small things that once bothered you as a kid no longer affect you, and you care less about what people think of you. You know that being unpopular in social settings isn’t the end of the world, and in fact, depending on the circumstances, can be a good thing. Often it is the individual, who is a leader, who respectfully speaks up for what he believes, rather than being a follower who receives the most resentment. Mature adults tend to shrug these judgments off and embrace their individuality, To be able to accept feedback about your work performance and life decisions from others with more life experience without being offended, is indeed a characteristic of an adult.

2. When you apologize, you mean it.

As a child and a teenager life may appear to be much more about playing games and mind tricks than resolving real issues. If you’re surrounded by individuals who engage in bullying and hurtful gossip, you might need to step in and be the adult of the situation, if not change your circle of friends all together. When you do something wrong, and you are called out for it, rather than responding with a sarcastic comeback, simply apologize. Apologizing for your wrongdoings and understanding why the behavior was inappropriate is a skill that only mature adults possess. This level of maturity allows a situation to resolve itself quickly and for all parties to move on peacefully.

3. You manage your time

Being an adult means that you have a lot of commitments, and life will pull you in multiple directions at once. You do not, however, need to be worried about this and panic if you learn time management skills. You may not think you have the ability to manage everything in life at once, but you just might surprise yourself. By simply writing things down and coming up with a schedule, you will see that you can fit in your work, social life, exercising and family time all in good time. Don’t sweat the little things, take life day by day, and you should be fine.

4. You learn useful skills

Another primary characteristic of a successful adult is knowing how to carry out practical tasks. If you take the time to learn new skills such as obtaining a CPR certification for example or you become proficient with some home or car repairs, it will help you in your everyday life. It means that when people come to you with related problems, you can be the one who shows them how it’s done. You will be one of the persons everyone will come to for advice, and you will, therefore, feel valued as a person.

5. You empathize

You will learn as you grow older that everyone has their own problems. You may observe individuals engaging in behavior or making statements that ultimately hurt others in the process. Sometimes there will be an underlying reason why these people feel the need to assert themselves in such a mean-spirited manner, and it is often tied to something going on in their personal lives. They could be involved in an unhappy relationship or have a family member who is ill. Subsequently, they may feel that the only way to release their frustration is on others. Indeed, the behavior is wrong. However, it helps to know more about an individual and their circumstances, before making a judgment. By being able to look beyond the surface and empathize with people from all walks of life, you will be a better person and a much more successful adult.

6. You make friends anywhere

Being shy isn’t an excuse for not having friends. As a child it may not have been much of an issue, however, as an adult, we all need a circle of supporters and confidantes. If you experience anxiety in certain situations, it helps to have trusted people around with whom you can share and who may be able to help you cope with it. Take yourself out of your comfort zone and find people who will support you and in who you can confide. Expand your horizons and explore the possibilities. Your new best friend is waiting to greet you.

7. You know how to budget

The ultimate test of adulthood is being accountable for where your income is coming from and knowing where it is going. While it is nice to be able to spend when and where we’d like, unless we are a part of the rich and famous club, adults have to be more fiscally responsible. You will be able to establish a budget and stick with it. One of the true tests of being an adult is managing money and being able to put some aside for a rainy day. The goal is to save more than you spend.

8. You spend time alone

Being alone doesn’t mean you are lonely, it gives you a chance to be yourself and think about the things which thoroughly make you happy. You might have been afraid to go into town alone as a teenager however as an adult you could visit a museum alone and even take a walk alone in the park on a sunny day. The key is being comfortable enough with who you are as a person to not care what people think of you. To be honest, no one will likely even notice that you are alone, especially in a mid-size or larger city. Go ahead and enjoy yourself!

9. You negotiate your salary

Your salary isn’t as clear-cut as you may think. If you have been working at a job for a significant length of time and believe you deserve to be paid more money, you are well within your rights to ask for a raise. The ability to negotiate and ask for more is something which requires courage, as well as skill. The ability to do this successfully comes with adult confidence and experience.

10. You can cook

One of the essential skill you will ever learn is how to cook a basic meal. You cannot live off takeout and microwave dinners your entire life; you need to learn how to provide healthy nourishment for yourself. You don’t need to be a top=rated chef, but being able to make simple roasted meat and vegetables will give you an edge over most of your friends. If you don’t know where to start, there are some great YouTube channels such as Jamie Oliver’s which can help you learn those basic skills. You should know how to cook meals which contain every nutrient your body needs to stay fit and healthy. Shopping wisely for food may also benefit your finances.

11. You make small talk

A weird concept for some young adults in this age of technology is initiating random conversation. In our younger years and during college we are programmed only to start a discussion if it has a purpose. However, most adults aren’t fazed by rules of social conduct and will talk about random things such as the weather, traffic, and sports, even with strangers. Being able to do this will present you with opportunities to make new friends, network with others for possible career connections, as well as build your confidence.

12. You make things happen

When we’re children, our parents or some other adult in charge is usually making decisions for us. However when we enter college, for example, a great deal of decision making falls on us. You then have to step up, speak up and work for what you want in life.

A successful adult will have the ability to do what is necessary to make things happen in their lives. It means being confident in our own skills and knowledge and not being afraid to fail a few times before we succeed. Think of what you genuinely want in life and find out how to get there. Work hard every day, choose friends wisely and make decisions that will help you, not harm you in your present and future.

Step into your greatness by gaining true clarity about what you want for your life and don’t allow naysayers to deter you. Whatever you do, don’t just settle- not in careers, relationships or any other aspect of your life. Mediocrity is for average folks, and you are more than average. Believe.

Stand in your power and go for the gold. The world awaits your contributions so go out there and master the art of adulting.

Good luck!

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